Monday 1 November 2010

What if it goes wrong again?

Miracle of miracles, I did conceive in November 2010. But now, instead of being anxious about getting pregnant, we were petrified that something would go wrong again. I didn’t want to be faced with ending this pregnancy and I was really against doing any of the ultrasounds. I didn’t know how someone could go through it twice and not be destroyed by it. All I could think of was ‘If they find something wrong with the baby, I am going to punch the ultrasound technician, there is no way I am going to be able to take it.’ Or the alternative scenario: they find something wrong, I say thank you and excuse myself to go to the ladies, then find my way up to the top floor or the roof of the building, and just walk off the side. But I caved in and went for the ultrasound. It was fine. Our baby has no problems.

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